A Weakness?
Vulnerability is defined as “the quality or state of being exposed to the possibility of being attacked or harmed either physically or emotionally.” More often than not, we view vulnerability as a weakness. Brené Brown, author of Dare to Lead and Atlas of the Heart, tells us of the three main misconceptions about vulnerability and why we avoid it.
When we allow ourselves to be vulnerable, it feels like we are opening ourselves to being hurt and attacked. Opening up and revealing ourselves to others seem like we are giving our power away; thus, we feel exposed and defenseless. It’s not easy to expose our true feelings as we risk being judged or misunderstood.
So most of us, in not wanting to be hurt or being undefended, spend most our lives avoid being vulnerable. We protect ourselves by closing ourselves off, keeping people at arm’s length, and not putting ourselves “out there.” There is a feeling of dread about being open with others, especially when it comes to our emotions.
But Brené Brown says that “Vulnerability is not weakness; it’s our greatest measure of courage.” Although they may seem like total opposites, they are actually closely linked. When we allow ourselves to be vulnerable, we are actually showing courage. Brown contends that when we are being vulnerable, we are actually being courageous enough to face risk and uncertainty. When we are acknowledging truth and not avoiding emotional uncertainty, risk, and, exposure, we are being vulnerable; and that is a sign of being courageous.
Vulnerability and Healing
The cultural norm seems to be is to avoid vulnerability, but in our healing journey, vulnerability is the catalyst to healing. In order for healing to take place, we need to be vulnerable and reveal our true selves, which cultivate genuine connections with others. When we share our fears, hope, and pain, we are able to connect authentically with others, enabling them to empathize and support us. Through empathy, deep connections are developed, and this connection becomes a foundation for healing.
Another important element in healing is self-compassion, and vulnerability plays a huge role in self-compassion. For personal healing and growth to take place, we need to acknowledge our weaknesses, limitations, mistakes, and insecurities. When we accept our imperfect selves, we are more forgiving, more patient, more accepting of ourselves. Vulnerability helps us accept our imperfect selves with compassion.
Another way that vulnerability helps in our personal healing is that it opens us to new experiences. When we embrace vulnerability, we take more risks, and we are able break old patterns and constraints. Thus, we are become more effective in directing our journey toward healing.
As mentioned earlier, vulnerability is a sign of courage. When we expose our true selves and open ourselves to potential pain, we step into vulnerability. In choosing to be vulnerable, we are showing our courage. This courage furthers our healing journey as we become more resilient and strong to face our challenges.
For most of us, uncertainty is anxiety inducing. But when we accept our vulnerability, we are better at managing the uncertainties of life as we become more flexible, resilient, and adaptable to the highs and lows of life—all valuable traits in our healing journey.
Lastly, being vulnerable is the gateway to self-discovery. Being vulnerable gives us the safe space to delve into our inner self and learn all of our thoughts and feelings. We discover our strengths and weakness and understand our motivations. When we know ourselves, we are better at identifying what we need in order to heal, thus facilitating our healing journey.
Conclusion
In our healing journey, the power of vulnerability cannot be denied. When we understand that our vulnerabilities are not a sign of weakness rather an indication of strength and courage, then the possibility of healing is not only promised but assured.
Sources:
Khera-Pattar, Pavan. “Transformative Power of Vulnerability in the Healing Journey.” Last modified July 14, 2023. https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/transformative-power-vulnerability-healing-journey-pavan?trk=article-ssr-frontend-pulse_more-articles_related-content-card.
Southside, Center of Hope. “The Healing Power of Vulnerability.” Accessed March 23, 2024. 202https://www.southsidecenterofhope.org/the-healing-power-of-vulnerability. Whitworth, Elizabeth. “33 Brené Brown Vulnerability Qoutes plus Context.” Last modified August 2, 2023. https://www.shortform.com/blog/brene-brown-vulnerability-quotes.
